Posted by isaac on December 19, 2001 at 16:39:36:
In Reply to: Career/ relationship.... posted by Emma on December 17, 2001 at 08:33:33:
but i'd tell my significant other that if they wanna hook up when i come back to visit, i'd probably be up for that, or if they wanna come visit sometime, that's probably ok, too. but i wouldn't make the effort to stay "true" to them, waste time on feeling jealous about them, or spend more time on communication than my schedule accomodates. a breakup on good terms with a possibility of re-kindling is the best solution, i think.
of course, i'm not married or anything right now. actually, the above conditions are about what my romantic situation is now, and we live 2 blocks apart. the best thing to do, tho, i think, is to be prepared for the changes in the relationship. depends on the seriousness of the relationship. if you try to hard, and it's not worth it, then it'll fall apart. i'd probably just cut to the chase; break up when i left, but make it clear that i'm not ending the relationship becasue i don't like her, just cause i don't have time for her, and when i do, if she's still available and we're still interested, i'd definitely be up for seeing her again. it sucks being tied to anything, especially something far far away. what happens if i meet someone in the new place, and fall absolutely in love with her? or if she does while i'm away? too many headaches. better just to put it on hold for a while, and if there's still something there when we meet again, great. if not, oh well.
isaac