Posted by Margaret on June 22, 2000 at 21:19:29:
In Reply to: Re: easy there, Perceiver posted by Perciever on June 21, 2000 at 23:58:49:
I do not beleive in S&M - that is pain - pain is wrong - I think it's horrible to "relish" it.
Pain is meant by God as a learning tool - not a source of pleasure. People have abused what He brought for as the purpose for pain was in the first place, twisted it around, and made a mockery of Him for it - by promoting it as some kind of cheap source of thrill or pleasure - as if it had no higher purpose than just that - and that - it surely is not!
As for D&S - I *do* believe that there exists a kind of "order" in this world - where we live in many multiple series of "gradations".
These mutiple series of gradations exist to differentiate us from each other. They enable to tell us where we stand with each other - they help us locate our constantly moving places within the world.
Naturally, within these orders, are going to be levels of where one is higher or stronger than another and so forth.
We all cannot be clones.
Yet all of us have different strengths and different weaknesses.
On some arenas we rank on the high end - on others the lower.
It all depends on what arena, what role, etc. we are in at the moment and time and place called for.
In regards to assessing potential marital relationships - I believe people should talk about where they stand with each other and what will work with them and not work. Why not be up front about what you are willing, able, and prepared as well as not willing, able and prepared to live with for the rest of your life?
If someone wants to hide and not tell what they will and will not accept - why enter into an agreement with them? Why go for unneccesary too high a risk? Hiding creates mistrust. Why waste time creating that?
Better to move forward to finding someone who prefers to be straight up, upfront and honest about what they want.
As for your complaining about my lousy attempts at trying to get married - I never wanted to before - so this is all new - give me a break - I'm not good at this stuff. So it might take a few mistakes before I get it right - so - how the world am I supposed to know?
So far no one wants to get married to me either - so what are you complaining about?
Yet I'm not going to let that stop me from living my life.
And certainly would never let that corrupt my soul, or worse, become an
excuse, a license even, to hurt others.