Posted by Flower Pagan (68.35.113.192) on January 31, 2003 at 14:46:05:
In Reply to: Re: Way to kill yourself, dude... posted by K.B. (152.163.189.168) on January 31, 2003 at 04:02:30:
FP: It is obvious that you ignored Froggy's responses (except the first one) because he gave you the answers to ALL of your questions beyond just the basic ones. You don't want others to ignore you, but you barely replied to him while ignoring most of what he wrote to you. It seems like you only care about yourself and wanting to only hear what you want to hear, instead of the truth. If that is the case, I know not to waste my time with this foolishness anymore.
FP: Here is what he said again! He took the time out to share an experience of his that he went through himself trying to relate to you. Your response will reflect the truth of your character, which does concerns me with my ONE wing. I am sorry I can't change myself from being a 9w1 this is how I am.
> > > > 1. Why do I want so much for Emily to accept my apology and especially for her to apologize?
> > > Let's start out by asking, "What if we were a lot alike?" Generally, when it comes to anger and the party I am angry at will not acknowledge my anger, I can really hold a grudge. Earlier this year, I was in the Houston airport rushing for the gate for a plane that should've started takeoff 5 minutes ago. Every time I have been in the Houston airport, the gate that your flight is supposed to be at changes, and invariably, it's in another wing of the airport. I went to the wrong wing and had to rush all the way back from where I started. I have a foot disorder, so I was about ready for a wheelchair, but still trying to run for my life, and taking on the appearance of a person with cerebral palsy while I was at it. I yelled to an attendant to call the gate and tell them they had a passenger rushing for his freakin' life to get there. "I can't do that, sir." was her response. Ah, the spirit of Houston. To this day, I still dream of giving her appendage enhancements that cause her legs to cross one another if she tries to run or take too big of a step.
> > > But where does this get me? The woman does not care. She's long forgotten that some mentally deficient man asked her to call a gate and she still has her job. If confronted, she would say, "Who really gives a flying fart?" Looks like I am the onestuck with the problem. And it looks like you are stuck in the same situation with Emily. She really could care less, and it would be a lot more effort than she would ever want to expend on you to apologize. You are causing yourself to suffer based on a condition you can't control. You've put yourself in Hell, knowing that she will never apologize. Days of anguish and angry posts on the board, nights of heartburn and tossing and turning; Knowing that nobody else cares; Punishing yourself for something Emily won't do -- You're doing this all to yourself. Way to kill yourself, dude... If you really are similar to me, then we can do stuff like this to ourselves all the time. Let's just slip and break out the tequila. "To a life of hell or an early grave." Sound good? We can unlearn such behaviors.
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> > > I'd like to know, gang your answers to these questions. Please be honest and spare the wisecracks, please. Speak what you feel.
FP: You don't seem to be looking for honesty, you appear to be more concerned about looking for people to agree with you that it is okay to be vindictive towards Emily. It is not okay.
Forr
> > From this introduction, I take it that the grudge you have with Emily is honest-to-goodness, and we're not just trying to see how thin we can spread the fun. (Because if we are, the fun's gotten pretty thin this far off.)
FP: It is becoming a foolish waste of time and it is getting old.
> I was a new poster and after I got into controversy; my words got twisted around by then moderator Mikko (now settled and closed) and Emily jumped in the fray which caused me to run out of there and come back as KB. She was pretty vicious.
FP: The past is gone, but the Emily I know now is a very nice and informative person who has concerns about animal rights with a passion and is doing something about her beliefs with her actions and example, while most people just talk. She is contributing to the world.
> Came back as KB and then the 2000 clique ignored much of what I posted until I got some good posts out that got responded to. Emily then started to cut my posts by posting hers right on top of mine without answering mine. I was the most prolific poster on 9Types and was a threat to her popularity. I know that she wanted to be number one along with Mikko and Cory. I had good things to say; was as humorous and had interesting posts like Cory but she made sure he got the notice. She was a new moderator and allowed Cory to post his drunken ravings right on top of my Enneagram posts and all the phonies started responding to his and buried mine. I tried to reason with her but she denied everything.
FP: The 2000 clique ignored you. There is no laws that says they have to pay attention to you and your posts if it doesn't interest them. What makes you more special than anybody else? Everybody else has posts that has been ignored. I have tons of them. Even Froggy poured his emotional pain out on this board last week and not one person responded to his post, not even you, so what makes you think you are more important than Froggy, Perceiver, Emily, Emoot, Epoxy, Primer Gray, Pork, Bertram Ostrer, Diarmuid, etc...? Tell me what makes you more important than the rest of us? Please, help me to understand the logic of your thinking.
FP: How do you know if she wants to be number one? She doesn't give me that impression. I think that is your perception of her. I was not aware there were competition on this message board. I thought this is the place you come and correspond about Enneagrams to topics of your interest, not about people's chaotic hostility. Responding to your posts defeats my purpose of coming on this board. I need to use my time more wisely.
> Things fell apart after that.
FP: You apparently made that choice. Why punish us for what you chose?
> Can I get an apology from her if I apologize for my excesses as I did a few days ago?
FP: She apparently don't want your apology based on her actions on this board. This is probably just a message board to share her ideas on, just like it is for many of us. Do you have anything to contribute concerning the Enneagram?