Posted by Cory on October 30, 2000 at 20:49:36:
In Reply to: Its Great To Be A Loner posted by K.B. on October 29, 2000 at 19:16:52:
Congratulations on writing the first post of value on the Chat Board! Normally this is a vocal ground for gossip, URL posting, inane chatter, and rumor mongering but you finally broke the mold.
I don't know. Maybe its because I see a lot of similarities in us. I always like hearing/reading about older men who have roughly the same personality type as me because it gives me a heads-up or at least an idea of what my future will be like. (You are a 4w5 INFJ correct?)
: When I was younger, I was the sort of guy that wanted to be admired and liked but wound up in the background.
Oh hell yea! I'd like to be a comedian or an artist -- something which gets my name recognized and makes me feel powerful.
: {Charlie Brown Syndrome}. I dreamt of being a Rock star or athlete; people saw me {if at all} as a serious type of bookworm.
A Friendly Acquaintance at work typed our circle of workers' personality types -- but no, not the enneagram or the Myers-Briggs. He described me as "the introverted intellectual". He is an ExFP 6w7 himself and a self-described "all-around guy". This is very interesting because I am different people with different people. Put me with an attractive, friendly girl and suddenly I am much more outgoing and charming -- acting like a 3 or a 7. Put me with a boss and I'm friendly and hardworking like a 6. Get to know me intimately enough and I just might act as a 4.
: > I discovered reading, thinking and the beauty and peace from taking long walks. I mean LONG walks, I'd go miles and miles nonstop for hour after hour. I learned to enjoy my own company, appreciate my humor and {subjective?} insights, and learned to like myself and not need to share anything with others or get their feedback.
I can enjoy my own company, mostly because I'm just so entertaining to myself (I love creating stories and jokes in my head) and I can split my personality off so it's like I'm talking to a whole other person.
: > In a place like where I work, bored people {most of the workers there are bored} become gossip mongers, trouble makers and fighters.My section is divided into cliques that dislike each other; I resisted this and let it be known from the beginning that I was "neutral" and here to work. So I get along with all, but get plenty of co-workers gossiping to me and trying to "sway" me. {And these are males doing much of this}.And there are many who want to know about me as well, like why do I dump so much, why am I so quiet, why am I so cool all the time, etc?
I guess you could say I am neutral, but I'm much more duplicitious. Everyone would think I'm on their side! At work, one guy Jeremy hates this other guy Carlos because Carlos is a bit bossy and rough. When I'm with Jeremy, I talk to him about Carlos behind his back. When I'm with Carlos, I play it cool with him and don't act antagonistic. Not that I AM taking sides, it's just I pretend I am on their side when I'm in fact neutral. I've done this in many situations.
But unlike you, nobody really wants to know me.
: > I could go unfriendly, but this isn't my style either. The ones who want to "know" about me are predominantly the women there and I can't resist a smiling face and soft voice and all. Not that they are "interested" as they know I'm married, but I can't snub a friendly woman. So when they ask me questions, I make them laugh or if they confide{if anyone confides in me} I listen. I stop listening if the problems are always the same, if the talker doesn't do anything to change it, if I can't help someone who keeps repeating the same thing.
Yea, my behavior changes around women. I become more extraverted and friendly. But that's because I am hoping for the slim chance that they might like me and *gasp* become interested in me!!! =oO Which never happens. Really! The other day I was talking to this girl and I "felt" like we had a connection and were getting along great. Then I see her today and her "Hello" was the most drained, obligated Hello I've ever got! Seriously -- women are so fucked up. I think I'll become gay. Seriously, if I had a choice about my sexuality I'd be a flaming homo any day of the week. Men have all the qualities I like -- quick wit, intelligence, and high sex drive. It's sad to say but I've never met a woman with a PERSONALITY. They're all so vapid and so ALIKE it's hard to tell them apart.
-Cory