Point Four: The Tragic Romantic

What helps Romantics

• Loss is real. It needs to be properly mourned and then set aside.
• Self-absorbed sadness can be broken by physical activity and service to others.
• Eliminate self-sabotage and incompletes. Finish projects.
• See through push-pull patterns of relating. Romantics desire the unavailable and reject what's easy to obtain.
• Discover a version in oneself of what is enviable in others.
• Quiet the attraction toward dramatic acting out. Inform others about how to handle your mood swings. The steady presence of a partner softens fears of abandonment.
• Focus on the good in what's available rather than on what's missing.
• Build support systems to handle periods of sadness.
• Expect that intimacy may trigger fears of loss and abandonment.
• Recognize the sweetness of melancholy and the ability to help others in pain.

Helen Palmer

The Pocket Enneagram:
Understanding the 9 Types of People
Harper & Row, 1988, 90 pages