The Questioner (the Six)

Questioners try to control their fear through vigilance, approval of authority figures, or through rebelling against authority.

Self-Preservation Sixes: "Ingratiating"
Those in the self-preservation subtype are sometimes referred to as warm Sixes because of their friendliness.

• I am responsible, loyal, and witty. I try to make sure that people like me because then I feel protected.
• I love opportunities to prove that I stand by my friends. The bonus is they'll stand by me when I need it.
• I evaluate carefully how authority figures perceive me so I can stay in, or get back in, their good graces.
• I can't help trying to be cordial, even when I'm angry with someone.
• I have many worries and doubts and look to others for assurance and protection.
• I analyze every ramification of every action I'm about to take in order not to make mistakes or to jeopardize my safety.
• I need to have a safe house and to feel protected from the outer world.

Relational Sixes: "Strength and Beauty"

• I am very energetic and competitive. I work hard to achieve my goals.
• I try to make myself strong (physically or intellectually) and attractive (sexually or aesthetically).
• I need to be sure either that people know me and care about me and will come to my aid, or that I am capable of defending myself.

Relational Sixes, especially males, are usually counterphobic and resemble Eights in many ways.

Social Sixes: "Duty"

• I'm in constant dialogue with a committee I carry around in my head. It's based on voices of authority from my family, school, and church. When I'm making a decision, I will refer to this committee to verify that I'm doing the right thing.
• I am loyal to those within my family or group and skeptical of outsiders.
• I either try to be conscientious and follow the rules or test and break them, preferably with the support of coconspirators.
• When those in charge tell me what to do, I either feel relived that the responsibility for the decision has been taken off my shoulders, or I become annoyed.
• It is not safe to depend on any one individual. I'd rather put my trust and support in a group or a cause.
• I am anxious about promotions. I want to succeed, but I worry about having serious responsibilities. I am also reluctant to take on a highly visible role where I might be ridiculed or criticized, as I do to my superiors.
• I have idealized a leader or a boss and later felt disillusioned.
• I can work untiringly for a cause I believe in.

Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele

Are You My Type, Am I Yours?
Relationships Made Easy Through the Enneagram
HarperSanFrancisco, 1995, 184 pages