Home  Tests  Types  Diagrams  Books  Forums  Search
Type 1 Type 2 Type 3 Type 4 Type 5 Type 6 Type 7 Type 8 Type 9

Type 4. Romantic

Tip! Click on the books on the left to read different author's descriptions for this type.

The description here was salvaged from Dave's Enneagram Site, when it was about to be deleted in 5/98. Check his new site for updates.
Naranjo
E-Type Structures
Palmer
-E-gram
E  in Love & Work
Pocket E-gram
Riso and Hudson
Understanding E-gram
Discovering Your Type
E-gram Transform.
Baron & Wagele
E-gram Made Easy
Are You My Type?
Keyes
Emotions and E-gram
Hurley & Dobson
What’s My Type?
Callahan
E-gram for Youth
Excerpts from Enneagram Books
   Palmer - The Pocket Enneagram
 

Point Four: The Tragic Romantic

Worldview
Something is missing. Others have it. I have been abandoned.

What helps Romantics

  • Loss is real. It needs to be properly mourned and then set aside.
  • Self-absorbed sadness can be broken by physical activity and service to others.
  • Eliminate self-sabotage and incompletes. Finish projects.
  • See through push-pull patterns of relating. Romantics desire the unavailable and reject what's easy to obtain.
  • Discover a version in oneself of what is enviable in others.
  • Quiet the attraction toward dramatic acting out. Inform others about how to handle your mood swings. The steady presence of a partner softens fears of abandonment.
  • Focus on the good in what's available rather than on what's missing.
  • Build support systems to handle periods of sadness.
  • Expect that intimacy may trigger fears of loss and abandonment.
  • Recognize the sweetness of melancholy and the ability to help others in pain.

Helen Palmer

The Pocket Enneagram:
Understanding the 9 Types of People
Harper & Row, 1988, 90 pages