The Questioner (the Six)
Questioners are responsible, trustworthy, and value loyalty to family,
friends, groups, and causes. Their personalities range broadly from reserved
and timid to outspoken and confrontative.
How to Get Along with Me
- Be direct and clear.
- Listen to me carefully.
- Don't judge me for my anxiety.
- Work things through with me.
- Reassure me that everything is OK between us.
- Laugh and make jokes with me.
- Gently push me toward new experiences.
- Try not to overreact to my overreacting.
What I Like About Being a Six
- being committed and faithful to family and friends
- being responsible and hardworking
- being compassionate toward others
- having intellect and wit
- being a nonconformist
- confronting danger bravely
- being direct and assertive
What's Hard About Being a Six
- the constant push and pull involved in trying to make up my mind
- procrastinating because of fear of failure; having little confidence
- fearing being abandoned or taken advantage of
- exhausting myself by worrying and scanning for danger
- wishing I had a rule book at work so I could do everything right
- being too critical of myself when I haven't lived up to my expectations
Sixes as Children Often
- are friendly, likable, and dependable, and/or sarcastic, bossy, and
- are anxious and hypervigilant; anticipate danger
- form a team of "us against them" with a best friend or parent
- look to groups or authorities to protect them and/or question authority
- are neglected or abused, come from unpredictable or alcoholic families,
and/or take on the fearfulness of an overly anxious parent
Sixes as Parents
- are often loving, nurturing, and have a strong sense of duty
- are sometimes reluctant to give their children independence
- worry more than most that their children will get hurt
- sometimes have trouble saying no and setting boundaries
Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele
The Enneagram Made Easy
Discover the 9 Types of People
HarperSanFrancisco, 1994, 161 pages