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The Peacemaker (the Nine)
Peacemakers are accomodating and are often out of touch with their anger.
Self-Preservation Nines: "Appetite"
- I am very attached to my rituals of watching TV, reading, working on
my computer, sleeping extra long, going to movies, and so on, and I feel
anxious when anything interferes with them.
- I tend to neglect important tasks and responsibilities and focus on
my habits instead.
- Food is prime in my life. Sometimes I use it to numb out, distract
myself, and cover up my feelings.
- I like to collect objects and information.
- Sometimes I have trouble throwing things away because I can't decide
which really matter to me.
- I try to meet my own needs by keeping my home, car, office, or purse
supplied with whatever I might want.
Relational Nines: "Union"
- I like the feeling of being in union with a lover, family member, friend,
mentor, famous person, guru, pet, nature, or the divine.
- When not in a relationship, I usually feel melancholy and yearn to
be.
- I try to make my partner happy, both to avoid conflict and because
his or her happiness will rub off on me.
- I am usually so focused on my companion that I fail to notice what
is going on with me.
- When my partner places demands on me, I either become stubborn, go
away emotionally, or go along so as not to make waves.
- I often blame others for things that are not right with my life.
- Sometimes I long to be more independent and discover my own priorities,
desires, and aliveness.
- I can stay with my own feelings best when I have an open expanse of time
alone.
Social Nines: "Participation/Nonparticipation"
- In adddition to wanting to further causes, I join groups in order to
structure my time, to soak up energy and become enlivened, to see how I
can best fit in, and to discover where to direct myself.
- Though I gravitate toward groups, I sometimes feel ambivalent about
whether I really want to belong.
- If someone becomes bossy or unpleasant, I often can't find the words
to speak out, and I become stubborn or withdrawn instead.
- I often stay on the fringe. This keeps me from having to commit myself
fully and from having to participate in conflicts.
- I bring my mediating skills and my ability to build consensus to groups.
- I often take the role of caretaker due to my tendency to want to be
all things to all people. Since I automatically become involved in whatever
floats by, I pick up nuances from others; but I'm slow to pick up and express
what I myself feel.
Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele
Are You My Type, Am I Yours?
Relationships Made Easy Through the Enneagram
HarperSanFrancisco, 1995, 184 pages
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