How thoughtful! I remember you from the early days, too...

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Posted by Derf on June 30, 1999 at 10:35:55:

In Reply to: Derf - I remember you way back when... posted by Summer on June 30, 1999 at 09:40:59:

: Hey Derf, since I've been on these boards (and it must be 2 years now) I remember you as one of the early posters who used to post alot. Didn't you think you were some other type back then, or is my memory failing? (like a 4w5?)

: How did you determine you were a 4w3? (same type as my brother)

Hey Summer,

I remember you from a long time ago, well past a year, but I didn't realize you had actually been with us since the board started (mid-to-late '97, about 2 years ago). There aren't many of us, are there?

It took time for the subtleties of the types to sink in. I tested 4w5 at first, and accepted, even preferred, that "reading," but a long (and sometimes surprising) search into my past mentality revealed more 3 energy in myself than I had first estimated.

Here's how I think the 3 wing helps me:

* I let things slide, and let go of hard feelings easily. I get over depressions quickly.

* I have a concern for physical well-being, appearance, and financial security.

* I put stock in the way people see me, therefore I don't get lost in my own unchecked will too often.

* I conceal and rationalize my emotions, stressing Nine-like agreeability.

* Self-improvement really does occupy my attention. I might call it a healthy obsession.

On the other hand, these advantages can backfire:

* I resent myself for disallowing myself "inappropriate" assertions of personal concern in an attempt to seem poised and unfazable.

* My concern for surface appearances, productivity, and "usefulness" in people, though it is latent, taints my ability to appreciate the deeper aspects of human nature.

* I sometimes lose my own initiative in my desire to please others and maintain my acceptability.

* The suppressed emotions that I have deemed "inappropriate" or "unattractive" remain, and cause much stress.

* I have unrealistically high expectations of myself, and habitually reject my true self in favor of an imaginary "self" that impresses me more.

Also....

* I am usually comfortable performing (giving speeches, playing roles, debating, teamworking, etc.), but I am socially uncomfortable.

* I worry too much about whether or not people like me, my persona, and my work.

* Though this "shadow" of my psyche is present, it is latent and therefore less detectable in me than it would be in, say, a 3w4. Therefore, not only does my 3-wing demand that I repress my emotions; my primary 4 fixation, also, makes an even stronger demand that my 3-wing remain at least appropriately subdued.

I don't know how similar this picture is to that of a 4w5 in the way that they feel on the inside. I hope I have been informative, if vague.

-Derf

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Re: How thoughtful! I remember you from the early days, too... Summer 11:27:13 6/30/99 (0)

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: : Hey Derf, since I've been on these boards (and it must be 2 years now) I remember you as one of the early posters who used to post alot. Didn't you think you were some other type back then, or is my memory failing? (like a 4w5?) : : How did you determine you were a 4w3? (same type as my brother) : Hey Summer, : I remember you from a long time ago, well past a year, but I didn't realize you had actually been with us since the board started (mid-to-late '97, about 2 years ago). There aren't many of us, are there? : It took time for the subtleties of the types to sink in. I tested 4w5 at first, and accepted, even preferred, that "reading," but a long (and sometimes surprising) search into my past mentality revealed more 3 energy in myself than I had first estimated. : Here's how I think the 3 wing helps me: : * I let things slide, and let go of hard feelings easily. I get over depressions quickly. : * I have a concern for physical well-being, appearance, and financial security. : * I put stock in the way people see me, therefore I don't get lost in my own unchecked will too often. : * I conceal and rationalize my emotions, stressing Nine-like agreeability. : * Self-improvement really does occupy my attention. I might call it a healthy obsession. : : On the other hand, these advantages can backfire: : * I resent myself for disallowing myself "inappropriate" assertions of personal concern in an attempt to seem poised and unfazable. : * My concern for surface appearances, productivity, and "usefulness" in people, though it is latent, taints my ability to appreciate the deeper aspects of human nature. : * I sometimes lose my own initiative in my desire to please others and maintain my acceptability. : * The suppressed emotions that I have deemed "inappropriate" or "unattractive" remain, and cause much stress. : * I have unrealistically high expectations of myself, and habitually reject my true self in favor of an imaginary "self" that impresses me more. : : Also.... : * I am usually comfortable performing (giving speeches, playing roles, debating, teamworking, etc.), but I am socially uncomfortable. : * I worry too much about whether or not people like me, my persona, and my work. : * Though this "shadow" of my psyche is present, it is latent and therefore less detectable in me than it would be in, say, a 3w4. Therefore, not only does my 3-wing demand that I repress my emotions; my primary 4 fixation, also, makes an even stronger demand that my 3-wing remain at least appropriately subdued. : : I don't know how similar this picture is to that of a 4w5 in the way that they feel on the inside. I hope I have been informative, if vague. : -Derf

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