Re: Feeling Alone

Posted by Hal on August 26, 1999 at 08:30:32:

In Reply to: Re: Feeling Alone posted by Amanda :) on August 25, 1999 at 16:09:46:

: Hi Hal :)

: I'm so very sorry to hear that you are going through such a difficult time. I just wish that I had something that I could say to ease your mind, but I'm afraid that I don't. I can only imagine how I would feel in your shoes. One thing I do know, however, is that our wonderful Creator weeps with you - and is always loving you - whether you feel it or not. Don't despair....I just KNOW that a wonderful person like you, with so much love to offer someone, will find "the one" and look back on these bleak days and realise how much you grew and learned from the process. "Pruning" is always an uncomfortable experience - but the fruits are always well worth the discomfort.

: Hang in there, my friend - and remember - we love you :)

: smiles
: Amanda :)

Thank you, Amanda. I needed to hear that I'm loved, though it doesn't remove the pain. As for God loving me, I just can't feel that right now. And that's where all this pain is coming from--a feeling of complete and utter separation. I wish I had your faith that I would find "the one" someday, but I don't. And I have no positive past experience to look back on to give me that faith. Over the years, none of the people I've been attracted to have been interested in me. It's very difficult not to despair over it. My mother has two uncles who never married and spent their lives alone. One of them finally started dating a woman in his late 60's. They're now both over 70. I don't even want to think about being alone for another 40 years or more, but right now, I can't see any evidence of change on the horizon.

Thank you again for your love. Despite what I've just said, it really does help. (If you can't tell, I'm feeling more than a little confused these days...)

- Hal -

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