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Re: 4c1 attitude: you're responsible for your own "hissy fits."

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Posted by S. K. on December 31, 2000 at 16:55:05:

In Reply to: 4c1 attitude: you're responsible for your own "hissy fits." posted by Freddie on December 31, 2000 at 13:59:34:

As someone who has overreacted quite often. :)

I believe that yes, we ARE all responsible for our own reactions (unless we have a serious mental disorder that prohibits us from reacting rationally), but in certain cases, there is ALSO an amount of responsibility on the provoker. For example, if that person deliberately set out to provoke with the intent of causing an overreaction, then they are just as responsible for CAUSING it as the overreactor is for HAVING it. The overreactor could have "chilled out" and chosen not to overreact, but then again, the provoker could just as easily have not tried provoking them in the first place. If you poke a dog with a stick long enough, might it not eventually attack? And are you not then responsible for causing that attack? A dog can't decide, like us, to chill out, but that's not quite the point; the provoker provoked, the dog "overreacted," as humans are often bound to do. Equal responsibility.

That's on a case-by-case basis, and not in general, however. Very often overreactions come about because of misunderstanding rather than deliberate provocation. In that case, the "provoker" may have a measure of responsibility for not having been clearer in their intentions, but the bulk of responsibility is on the person who overreacted, especially if the "provoker" was very clear with what they said or did, and did not deliberately provoke in any way.

Plus, there's always the deal with people who just are not emotionally stable and tend to overreact most of the time. No one ELSE is responsible for their reactions, but sometimes neither are they. You would have to blame a bad upbringing, faulty brain chemistry, etc. Some people truly CAN'T control the way they react.

Not sure if any of that made sense or was even on subject. Oh well. <:)

Follow Ups:

Sure, it was on subject. Freddie 21:54:38 12/31/00 (2)
- So, Freddie, how do you react when someone hits your sore spots? [nt] Mikko 11:56:53 01/01/01 (1)
  - That depends, but nonetheless, I do. And I know it's nobody's responsibility but my own. Freddie 13:20:23 01/01/01 (0)

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: As someone who has overreacted quite often. :) : I believe that yes, we ARE all responsible for our own reactions (unless we have a serious mental disorder that prohibits us from reacting rationally), but in certain cases, there is ALSO an amount of responsibility on the provoker. For example, if that person deliberately set out to provoke with the intent of causing an overreaction, then they are just as responsible for CAUSING it as the overreactor is for HAVING it. The overreactor could have "chilled out" and chosen not to overreact, but then again, the provoker could just as easily have not tried provoking them in the first place. If you poke a dog with a stick long enough, might it not eventually attack? And are you not then responsible for causing that attack? A dog can't decide, like us, to chill out, but that's not quite the point; the provoker provoked, the dog "overreacted," as humans are often bound to do. Equal responsibility. : That's on a case-by-case basis, and not in general, however. Very often overreactions come about because of misunderstanding rather than deliberate provocation. In that case, the "provoker" may have a measure of responsibility for not having been clearer in their intentions, but the bulk of responsibility is on the person who overreacted, especially if the "provoker" was very clear with what they said or did, and did not deliberately provoke in any way. : Plus, there's always the deal with people who just are not emotionally stable and tend to overreact most of the time. No one ELSE is responsible for their reactions, but sometimes neither are they. You would have to blame a bad upbringing, faulty brain chemistry, etc. Some people truly CAN'T control the way they react. : Not sure if any of that made sense or was even on subject. Oh well. <:)

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