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new girl in town

new girl in town

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Posted by Carrie on September 10, 1999 at 22:43:16:

Hi!
I've been reading these posts for a while but couldn't get past my reticence until now. But I was just attacked in a shyness newsgroup by an eight, maybe, something i scored really low in, and i thought, hey we may both be shy but it's all we have in common.
I've known about the Enneagram for about, oh, five or six years at least, and being a four(i think) am just fascinated by it and so amazed to find others who feel the same. dont all these introductions sound the same?

I scored really high in four, so high as to be suspect, when i first took the test oh so many years ago. But lately i've been scoring almost the same in five. I took the shorter test three times, scored as a four, then a five, then an even split. Guess that didn't help at all. I used to be very emotional, but my emotions have gotten more contained and i have become more isolated and more fiveish, though i find fourness more attractive.

Oh what does it all mean?

i was a very unhealthy, suicidal four, getting closer to average, i hope. after a while, even despair gets to be a bore.
like many of you i am unable to find/choose a career. my english degree seems useless to me and the whole academic game shallow and self indulgent.
i tried talking about being amerasian and how that affects my sense of identity in the shyness newsgroup but was accused of being self-pitying and throwing blame, etc, by some non-fours. was it the case? don't know. hope not.

since i've been blocked and stopped writing poetry, i've felt more fiveish and i cant say what came first. does anyone else feel that kind of slippage?

well i've rambled on a bit, but im very tired and feeling very stream-of-conciousness at the moment. I'd love a reply, any kind, so i can feel a part of something,not just some freakish disembodied head, or a thought without a thinker. something like that. making sense any?

Carrie, 27, in illinois. libra. infp.

Follow Ups:

Welcome to the Search Sam 22:52:51 9/10/99 (7)
- thanks for the welcome all Carrie 17:55:38 9/11/99 (0)
- thanks for the welcome all Carrie 17:54:58 9/11/99 (0)
- Re: Welcome to the Search Ev 12:35:57 9/11/99 (0)
- Re: Welcome to the Search Amanda :) 10:33:26 9/11/99 (3)
  - Re: Welcome to the Search Ronnie 11:29:46 9/11/99 (2)
    - Honesty - at a price! Amanda :) 11:56:23 9/11/99 (1)
      - Re: Honesty - at a price! Hal 13:27:10 9/13/99 (0)

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: Hi! : I've been reading these posts for a while but couldn't get past my reticence until now. But I was just attacked in a shyness newsgroup by an eight, maybe, something i scored really low in, and i thought, hey we may both be shy but it's all we have in common. : I've known about the Enneagram for about, oh, five or six years at least, and being a four(i think) am just fascinated by it and so amazed to find others who feel the same. dont all these introductions sound the same? : I scored really high in four, so high as to be suspect, when i first took the test oh so many years ago. But lately i've been scoring almost the same in five. I took the shorter test three times, scored as a four, then a five, then an even split. Guess that didn't help at all. I used to be very emotional, but my emotions have gotten more contained and i have become more isolated and more fiveish, though i find fourness more attractive. : Oh what does it all mean? : i was a very unhealthy, suicidal four, getting closer to average, i hope. after a while, even despair gets to be a bore. : like many of you i am unable to find/choose a career. my english degree seems useless to me and the whole academic game shallow and self indulgent. : i tried talking about being amerasian and how that affects my sense of identity in the shyness newsgroup but was accused of being self-pitying and throwing blame, etc, by some non-fours. was it the case? don't know. hope not. : since i've been blocked and stopped writing poetry, i've felt more fiveish and i cant say what came first. does anyone else feel that kind of slippage? : well i've rambled on a bit, but im very tired and feeling very stream-of-conciousness at the moment. I'd love a reply, any kind, so i can feel a part of something,not just some freakish disembodied head, or a thought without a thinker. something like that. making sense any? : Carrie, 27, in illinois. libra. infp.

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