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Are you talking about the "to love or not to love" tape recorder?

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Posted by emoot on June 02, 2001 at 15:26:11:

In Reply to: Have any of you Fours actually been guilty of push-pull? posted by Megan on June 02, 2001 at 11:51:27:

: I'm a 4 who has never been the actor in push-pull but has been the reactor.

: )

The "To Love or not to Love" Push/Pull tape recorder inside the (four?)forehead! Does it sound like this to you? Here is a simplistic version.

Push- I'd be better off alone without ever getting involved with anyone romantically. That way I can avoid pain and responsibility. (:

Transition- but my life would suck big time alone ):

Pull- Okay, Life sucks without love. I need a relationship to have a full and happy life. Love is so wonderful...it's the best human feeling.

Enter soul mate! I have it! I've found that perfect love that I've longed for. This man is making me feel better than I have ever thought possible! Oh joy of life! (:

Transition- Ouch....with love comes the risk of loss and pain! ):

Push- Risk! Pain! I don't do pain all that well and omygosh...I can't deal with losing my loved one! I can't risk this! I must run away! No one can be close to me! Back to solitude! ):

Transition- Gee....this bag of potato chips is getting stale...I'm feeling lonely again. ):

Pull- I can't go on without love. I must retrieve my soul mate! True happiness again! etc...... (:

After awhile this tape gets sort of pointless.....
Did it ever cause me to break up with my boyfriend? Yep. Why? Partly because when this four was faced with true love...I did not know love could be so complicated(lots of unforseen issues) and that it involved pain or maybe I did(My idealized version of love only envisioned a little bit of pain).... but still I did not know what to expect from it. Just a big ol fraidy cat, I guess.

Eventually I realized that the risk of love is worth the pain. And when I look at it now and see the fruits of it, I see that didn't even have to pay all that much for it!

Anyway....the boyfriend is now the husband and the tape in the recorder has
been replaced with the "Okay, it's not the end of the world...Let's work through this" tape. (:

Hey...um, I still don't know if this is what you were getting at but it was just laying around in my head and I felt the need to throw it out there. Clutter control, you know.

simply,
emoot

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: : I'm a 4 who has never been the actor in push-pull but has been the reactor. : : ) : The "To Love or not to Love" Push/Pull tape recorder inside the (four?)forehead! Does it sound like this to you? Here is a simplistic version. : Push- I'd be better off alone without ever getting involved with anyone romantically. That way I can avoid pain and responsibility. (: : Transition- but my life would suck big time alone ): : Pull- Okay, Life sucks without love. I need a relationship to have a full and happy life. Love is so wonderful...it's the best human feeling. : Enter soul mate! I have it! I've found that perfect love that I've longed for. This man is making me feel better than I have ever thought possible! Oh joy of life! (: : Transition- Ouch....with love comes the risk of loss and pain! ): : Push- Risk! Pain! I don't do pain all that well and omygosh...I can't deal with losing my loved one! I can't risk this! I must run away! No one can be close to me! Back to solitude! ): : Transition- Gee....this bag of potato chips is getting stale...I'm feeling lonely again. ): : Pull- I can't go on without love. I must retrieve my soul mate! True happiness again! etc...... (: : After awhile this tape gets sort of pointless..... : Did it ever cause me to break up with my boyfriend? Yep. Why? Partly because when this four was faced with true love...I did not know love could be so complicated(lots of unforseen issues) and that it involved pain or maybe I did(My idealized version of love only envisioned a little bit of pain).... but still I did not know what to expect from it. Just a big ol fraidy cat, I guess. : Eventually I realized that the risk of love is worth the pain. And when I look at it now and see the fruits of it, I see that didn't even have to pay all that much for it! : Anyway....the boyfriend is now the husband and the tape in the recorder has : been replaced with the "Okay, it's not the end of the world...Let's work through this" tape. (: : : Hey...um, I still don't know if this is what you were getting at but it was just laying around in my head and I felt the need to throw it out there. Clutter control, you know. : simply, : emoot

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