Re: No Flaws-The Priestess is there!

Posted by Tiggy/Rachel on September 12, 1999 at 20:59:52:

In Reply to: No Flaws-The Priestess is there! posted by Sam on September 12, 1999 at 18:53:55:

Thank you so much. That's the first thing that has made me feel any hope. I don't know how to fully understand the Priestess. It's very hard to stay strong when people are telling you you are mentall ill and need to go on something to sedate you. I usually only rage at my family where it is safe or occasionally with close friends. I don't know when this has ever happened before. I've never thrown anything before, though I've felt like it.

The most awful part was the people I thought were my friends, igonoring me and avoiding me. I don't understand why people are so weak and cowardly. How can I live in a world like this. i always thought that stuff about sin in the Bible was really exaggerated because most people were quite nice really, but they are so weak, so frightened of reality. I will never stop saying that. I am going to write to Sr. Kathleen who was the only one who tried to understand me, and try to explain more coherently, and I'm going to show her your message because I know she would appreciate it. She's in charge of the course, but there's some Monsignor above her so her hands are tied. She said I wasn't chucked off the course. Eight people (approx1/3rd have dropped out already so it's obvious something's wrong. None of the schools are happy with them because they're so disorganised.
It's a really difficult situation with it being a Catholic college too as I'm teaching world religions from an academic perspective and they're going on about how important it is to teach children both types of genuflection! They have no idea how different it is in a State school. They have to accept non Catholics to keep the numbers up.

i'm not sure what you say about it not being a rage against society. Do you mean it's just a rage against my own past? I have realised now why people get so frightened of me when I show my vulnerability. I represent the wounded child that everyone carries and lot s of people are too afraid to look at. I knew i represented some shadow in them.

Looking up Anger Management stuff - an exercise to diffuse your anger is to put your arms straight out to the side. Appaarently it diffuses out through your arms. I tried it and it made me think of the crucifixion.

Thankyou Sam. I'll read the message you sent every day.

Follow Ups:

• Rage Sam 23:04:33 9/12/99 (3)
  • Re: Rage Tiggy 23:56:43 9/12/99 (2)
    • Welcome back Sam 22:59:54 9/13/99 (1)
      • Re: Welcome back tiggy 00:39:09 9/14/99 (0)

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