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Fours Connecting Points (Stress and Security
Fours Connecting Points (Stress and Security
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Posted by Tiggy on September 23, 1999 at 22:16:41:
CONNECTING POINTS (Stress and Security)
Four's Connection to 2
Healthy connection brings interpersonal skills and the ability to voluntarily empathize with others. Can make good psychotherapists, teachers, ministers, parents. Teach others about the realms of subjectivity. Twoish capacity to identify with an audience. Good communicators, fine therapeutic skills. Can listen and accept, especially willing to understand the pain of friends. Less selfish. Will harbor and act upon ideals of service to others.
Low side brings dependency. Tendency to fixate on a loved one. Whiny demandingness and blame. Codependent melodrama when the real person behaves differently than the Four expects them to. Think they can't live without the other. Twoish capacity to empathize becomes compulsive. Four can't help but identify, especially with others' pain. Takes "beloved" person inside of their subjectivity, making that person their salvation. They may flee themselves by serving others. Prideful sense of specialness is also intensified. Hysterical illness possible. Four's Connection to 1
Healthy connection to 1 brings objectivity, balance and idealism. Helps Fours locate the objective world and connect to a factual reality that is independent of their inner feelings. Like finding dry land in a sea of subjectivity. Discipline of cleaving to the real world diminishes self-indulgence and melodrama. Practical problem-solving skills enhanced. Intense feelings smooth out, a kind of balanced equanimity takes hold. Will also be idealistic and willing to work hard out in the world for what they believe in. Become contributors instead of complainers.
The low side of this connection is that a Four can become faultfinding and nit-picky. Dissatisfied perfectionism may color their relationships. Get creatively blocked because nothing they produce is up to their own high standards. Induce shame in themselves with inner criticism. May tear down others out of jealousy. Sometimes latch onto a grandiose, obsessive Big Idea. Belief they are attuned to Absolute Truth. Idealistic and artistic pretentiousness possible. Sometimes can be rageful.
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