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Posted by Margaret (206.203.36.170) on April 27, 2002 at 14:46:34:

In Reply to: Re: Conquering your fears (specifically, avoidance behaviour) posted by Sharlee (203.45.206.21) on April 24, 2002 at 08:37:33:

It was not as bad as I thought. I got one month membership and I'm so glad I did it. If I just concentrate on my routine, all the other things I worry about aren't much a concern anymore.
I do have a lot of stressors in my life though. And it does seem to make even the little things difficult. I am so ancy and so nerve-wrecked with not having a permanent steady, stable home to live currently, I am not able to take this much longer. I am giving myself 4 weeks to find something stable here, if that does not happen, I am moving south and getting stable there. Although I feel scared in doing that as well, this not being steady and permanent is really wearing on me. I don't have much more patience for it, and the need for security is greater than my fears.

: #### Margaret, perhaps there are bad vibes you feel there that are translating into your putting forward all of these reasons. I belong to a male and female health club. There are all types there from overweight men and women to underweight, from the trendily dressed to the T shirt and boxer short brigade, from the young to the old. I have found that noone is looking at anyone else (at least not at me, maybe the superfit may attract second glances)but I don't sense any judgement. I doubt that you would be the only woman in the weights room as these days it is really quite popular with women who attend gyms. Exercise will make you feel good so keep at it if you can; however do not be hard on yourself if you don't. You are having a lot of changes in your life at the moment and even small things such as going to the gym may be stressful. I have felt quite stressed myself the last 12 months and have found that when some regular things I used to do quite happily start to make me feel stressed, I slow down my pace and don't put any expectations on myself. I see this as a temporary thing until the current stressors in my life get relieved. Sharlee

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: It was not as bad as I thought. I got one month membership and I'm so glad I did it. If I just concentrate on my routine, all the other things I worry about aren't much a concern anymore. : I do have a lot of stressors in my life though. And it does seem to make even the little things difficult. I am so ancy and so nerve-wrecked with not having a permanent steady, stable home to live currently, I am not able to take this much longer. I am giving myself 4 weeks to find something stable here, if that does not happen, I am moving south and getting stable there. Although I feel scared in doing that as well, this not being steady and permanent is really wearing on me. I don't have much more patience for it, and the need for security is greater than my fears. : : #### Margaret, perhaps there are bad vibes you feel there that are translating into your putting forward all of these reasons. I belong to a male and female health club. There are all types there from overweight men and women to underweight, from the trendily dressed to the T shirt and boxer short brigade, from the young to the old. I have found that noone is looking at anyone else (at least not at me, maybe the superfit may attract second glances)but I don't sense any judgement. I doubt that you would be the only woman in the weights room as these days it is really quite popular with women who attend gyms. Exercise will make you feel good so keep at it if you can; however do not be hard on yourself if you don't. You are having a lot of changes in your life at the moment and even small things such as going to the gym may be stressful. I have felt quite stressed myself the last 12 months and have found that when some regular things I used to do quite happily start to make me feel stressed, I slow down my pace and don't put any expectations on myself. I see this as a temporary thing until the current stressors in my life get relieved. Sharlee

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