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Enneagram Type 4 Board Archive Re: Positive things about being a THREE.Posted by Hal on July 28, 1998 at 16:02:08: In Reply to: Positive things about being a THREE. posted by Jordan on July 28, 1998 at 04:36:53: : No matter what everyone thinks, It's pretty cool to be a 3. It would seem to be all a matter of perception. One man's cool qualities make another man sick to his stomach. Here's my take on your positive things, from the perspective of a 4w5: : * If I have a goal in mind, I know exactly how to attain it. By lying, cheating, and stabbing others in the back if necessary. : * I never "ride the fence" when thinking about what I should do. I generally know exactly which choice to make and immediately have reasons to back up my choice. Even if you have to talk through your ass and fabricate these reasons, presenting them as absolute truth. : * Being able to change images like a chameleon, allows me to have many friends. You have many aquaintances. I wouldn't be satisfied with friendship based on deception. : * I am highly skilled in figuring out the best way to solve a problem. I'll give you that one. But 5's are better (and 4w5's too :-) : * Contrary to popular belief, I am a very good motivator. I know how to make people set goals for themselves. If you're a healthy 3, yes. Otherwise, you could be such a pain to deal with that others will accept your "motivation" just to get you off their backs. : * I'm an excellent promoter. If you have something to sell, I know how to sell it. I hate salesmen (it's that lying and cheating thing again...) : * I am very good at judging other people. This not only helps me see what I have to do to make you like me, but it also aids in telling if you are a person that can help me attain my goals. You're good at judging how people can help YOU, and how YOU can manipulate them. And the more someone changes his behavior to MAKE me like him, the more I hate him. I'm sure this phoniness doesn't sit well with other types as well--it couldn't just be a 4 thing. And there are many deeper level to understanding people that 3's are not good at--judging is not the same thing as understanding. : * I rarely fail. In your own mind, anyway. 3's tend to fool themselves on this sometimes, seeing the "facts" as they would like them to be. And why do you base your entire self-image on success or failure?
: * I don't show my emotions and don't really care about yours. No argument there. Now, of course there are there are things 4's do that other people can't stand--there's no shortage of messages on the non-4 enneagram board about that. But even the "positives" of a certain type can be seen as very negative from another perspective, especially when someone starts tooting their own horn about them--another 3 trait that many find distasteful. - Hal -
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