Re: Hmm...5/4 competing?

Subject:

Comments:
: I went through an accute inner conflict between parts 4 and 5 some years back. The answer is that there is room for each to express their inner treasures. What fuels the conflict is massive mutual misunderstanding between the two parts. Find small projects on which they will productively cooperate and thus learn to build mutual esteem. Often the roots of these conflicts were put there by our family environment, we internalised an outside value conflict between two or more adults that mattered to us. If you succeed in finding a common ground for these two parts to share, you'll discover that their cooperation can create amasing outcomes! : : : Hi Laurence! I had a feeling that last post might annoy, or at least pique someone. It isn't exactly the most articulate way to describe how I feel about these sort of competing sides of myself, and I certainly wouldn't want to universalize those statements...It's just how I feel. I know that beauty, love, and spiritual joy are universals--I really do. I guess that sometimes, however, I feel trapped in an unfeeling, shallow, paranoid, materialistic society, but generalizing about that probably doesn't help anybody. : : I'm still unsure about the whole "path or a channel" thing though. I honestly feel like I'm stuck right in the middle. I can think of a thousand examples of manifesting both five and four tendencies throughout my life. Understanding is very important to me, feeling is incredibly important to me. I couldn't say which "wins". : : : : : Beauty, love and spiritual joy are universal values, all depends what's being put in it, the specific elements that will allow identification of these values, and this is very subjective, I'd say the earthly translation of energies. : : : Our basic type is like a path or a channel, it does not preclude a high receptivity to the energy of our close neighbors (the wings). : : : I am very sensitive to beauty, like ALL human beings, I do need love and spiritual joy is highly priced by type five people (knowing is a form of spiritual joy, by the way). But I won't let my life be led by erratic feelings, meaning comes first. To seize the difference of priority is sometimes quite tedious though in the case of people going through a period of crisis or deep doubts. : : : : : : I was sure I was a 5/4 for the past five years, until very recently when I started reading and rereading and testing again. Now I'm pretty sure I'm a 4/5. But it is weird how close to the middle I am. More feeling than thinking though, I think. Or I feel that way, I guess. : : : : It's been sort of shaking my belief in the enneagram in a way though, which I've pretty much had complete faith in up until now. : : : : I'm looking at it this way (for now): the four in me is what I want to be, to develop, and in a way which I feel was partially crushed out of me due to growing up in an extremely cruel, sarcastic household. Not a good place for sensitive artists to thrive. I think I withdrew and became more fiveish for protection. But what I love most in myself and my life is closer to four than five. Deep deep deep connection to beauty, love, and spiritual joy.

Optional Link URL:
Link Title:
Optional Image URL: