Posted by Joe Black on January 03, 2001 at 17:52:40:
In Reply to: Re: living at the top of our hearts and fists posted by Janet on January 01, 2001 at 11:28:01:
: Right on!! Nice to know I am not the only person who thinks this way. The only odd thing is that I am female and thus feel misunderstood as being a harsh bitch. I really try to look out for mine and those close to me's interest. It is indeed hard to keep the distance that makes me uncomfortable with lovers, friends when I see the potential to make a good life. It is hard to trust to relinquish the independence and yes, control I have on my own. It is scary inside and out sometimes. Closing off and judging myself and others harshly has become a way of life. Who can we trust more than ourselves? Why should we trust others when it seems they do not meet the standards we have set for ourselves??? Talk to me...I am done venting now...
I seem to have a monopoly onthat whole distance thing. I just feel that I am in the right when I'm told that I talk down to people when they try to meddle in my affairs. Don't f*** around in my life and I won't f*** around in yours. Not the best attitude to have but I'm workin' on it. On the other hand, though, I noticed that when I have taken an active role in someone's life that I despise I leave feeling like I am still human and I have needs too. I still have some mixed emotions when it comes to dealing with friends and co-workers that give me advice on my life as if I asked for it. Genuine, good intentioned words are appreciated but not like fate of the world rests on me being like you. Which is how I think I take it sometimes. Do you sometimes feel that when you are alone all you do is think.