Posted by Jen on January 04, 2001 at 02:00:16:
In Reply to: depressed fives? posted by bilo on December 29, 2000 at 07:03:16:
I'm also a 5w4, intp. I'm now 21 and have been suffering from boughts of depression since i was 14. I have many of the same complaints toward medications that many of you have mentioned. Therapy seems better for me and many other 5s b/c you just don't want to feel "better" you want to know exactly what that is and why you stopped feeling that way in the first place. Unfortunately, now that I've worked up the guts to actually expose my inner self to a stranger, I'm left without medical insurance. I'm actually taking a year off and (ugh) living with my parents b/c I couldn't cope anymore and realized something needed to change fast. I started taking an ssri and, in really simplified terms of sad or happy, I felt "happier". But I also felt even more numbed from my emotions than I tended to be as a regular 5, which I knew was the initial cause of my depression. At one point I actually was trying to cry so I could just get rid of all the persistent negative feelings that the drugs were blocking from me, and I couldn't. So I stopped the medication cold turkey (bad, bad idea) and had to cope with physical and mental symptoms of withdrawal. I'm back on half the dosage, which is just enough to take the edge off and keep suicidal feelings at bay, without completely numbing me. Now that the hard work is over, all I have to do is get in touch with over seven years of repressed thoughts and emotions!!;-)