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Enneagram Type 5 Board Archive Re: momentary lapse of reason...Posted by Heidi on August 13, 2000 at 16:22:02: In Reply to: Re: momentary lapse of reason... posted by Zen Cowgirl on August 13, 2000 at 15:19:28: To Zen Cowgirl and Robin--Thanks for the support. It's nice to know that you don't think I'm a freak. I think I was "feeling exposed" after saying what I did, so your responses were most soothing. Z.C.--I'm thankful for your words. I think we *should* talk about the difficulty of being a female five. In a post below, I talked about my stance, as a female five, on having children. I didn't get any response. I think relationships with men are difficult because there are so few men who appreciate a woman with a strong, critical mind. It seems culturally and socially women who don't fit the emotional and nuturing mold are viewed as some sort of feminazis. It's a shame men should feel that way. The problem I see with that is, when it comes right down to it, female fives (and 8s) are outnumbered. I don't know about your political views, and I don't mean to offend, but the women's lib thing doesn't help people like you and me. As a direct result of it, things are worse for us (female fives) because now there are even more negative connotations to being strong and independent. Let's face it, we're *still* outnumbered, even after the w.l.m. because human nature hasn't really changed in the last thirty or so years. There are just as many nuturing/emotional girls as ever. I see our situation is one that defies culture, social standards and even biology (to a certian extent). I agree with you entirely, five women ccan have a hard time of it--it's lonely to be who you are and not be accepted for it because it doesn't really fit into people's perception of the world. It's not just in intimate relationships with men, but with the world at large. Women can be the perpetrators, too. For me, it's almost worse to hear "you're not very lady-like" from a woman. I agree with what you said earlier about femininity--having the required plumbing and hormones to be female equals being feminine. No one would look at me and have to guess what my gender is. I see that makes me just as feminine as the emotional/nuturing types. I've always survived it by telling myself that men and women alike are just jealous, but somehow it doesn't always help. I think it's more lonely than anything else.
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