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Enneagram Type 5 Board Archive Re: Nightmares (Second of my own)Posted by Sambersil on October 20, 2000 at 20:10:57: In Reply to: Nightmares posted by Lucid Dreamer on October 20, 2000 at 15:03:46: This was the last dream of a long string of dreams in the night I dreamt it. Beginning: Everything is dark. It is night. I am looking at our kitchen from outside - we live in the geographical center of the town, but in a highly forested and secluded neighborhood, on the edge of a large trail system and forest (Massachusetts USA). We live on the top of a hill, but on a large plot of land (for a forested area), so there is no sense of "neighborhood". I am alone in the dream. The kitchen has no walls, and no windbreak, so I can see the dark interior of the kitchen. I kind of walk or float into the kitchen - just the motion, not the actual method of motion. I sort of drift through the house, when suddenly something makes me turn (physically - now I am not floating) - I think it was a kind of click, though I don't remember exactly. I thought I saw one side of a chair sort of settling down from about 1/2 inch in the air. There was a bit of a rattle, almost imperceptible. Unsure, I turned back, then noticed that the chair legs were definitely off the ground, about an inch. Stricken with fear, I walked back toward the kitchen, trying to say something- I forget what. I could not speak; I could exhale, but I could not make my vocal cords to vibrate. Out of terror, but also out of a will to make some coherent vocal noise, I tried to scream. Nothing but exhalation, and I tried again, and this time, it went like hhhhhhhh (just exhalation) then as I reached the end of my breath, my throat kind of stuck together (try it, you will see that if you exhale until you can no more, it will happen to you) and I made a sound as I regained my breath. I tried again, and got a sort of quiet ehhhhhh, a bit of what I was trying to do (AAAAAH!). At some point during my attempts at speech or noise of some sort, I was partially paralyzed in my body as well as my vocal cords, and trying very hard to remain standing, and not succeeding very well. Suddenly, everything was flying about. This dream was STRONG, very strong; I could FEEL how they moved. They moved like they were just sort of drifting upward, and I could feel how it would be to be an object in such a state, then they rushed with anger, and I could feel their anger. This is a primal fear for me; I can imagine few things more terrible than suddenly inanimate objects floating out of the grip of gravity and moving around. It was especially bad because it was in our kitchen; I have a lot of my first memories from there, and our kitchen is one of the most home-like and safe feeling places there are for me, all comforting earth tones (our kitchen is the oldest part of the house, and it has walls of pine logs[gone in this dream]). There was a sense of disturbed sanctum, of shattered peace. After a moment of confusion and fear, a kitchen chair suddenly jammed itself behind me and a white sheet wrapped itself around both myself and the chair, and pushed me back until I was sitting in the chair with my back at the partition between the middle room and the kitchen. I was still paralyzed, and now I could not see anything either because of the white sheet billowing in front of me and sticking me to the chair. I became aware of a spirit. You know how it feels when you make a stupid mistake and you say to yourself something like, Ohh, of COURSE, the ... and then you explain to yourself something that you should have known before? I began receiving statements, obviously from the spirit but in my own mental voice in that OF COURSE tone, to the effect that I could be, I forget the exact wording, a "dark thief" or an "evil thief" or something like that, with special powers, in service to the spirit, if I followed the instructions of the spirit. I found a pair of silver scissors in my hand, and cut a bit of my hair off, while the spirit said, in my mind but in its own voice now, something about how that was a special step in becoming a true thief or whatever it had said in the first place. The spirit worded it the way the Evil Queen in the Disney animated version of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves worded her spell to make herself older - something like "A lock of hair to --" whatever, nothing the spirit said I remember very clearly. With a similar prompting from the spirit (this time something about age, as in age of the soul, I remember it was very creepy), I took a silver comb and began to run it through my hair, and my hair turned white (I don't know how I knew this) as the comb touched it, and my head felt cold and dead and old where the comb had gone over it. Midway through this process of soul aging and deadening, I got a hold of myself. Resisting, I asked the spirit, over and over, "Do you have my best interests in mind? Do you have my best interests in mind?" with the same sort of animatedness that was present when I took my retractible pen to defend the earth against alien hatred in my other dream. At first, it was nothing, but then my voice came to me, and it came louder until it was my normal speaking voice, and the spirit went away and I woke up. The end. I think that the reason why I was seduced by the spirits promises of turning me evil and a thief was that telekenesis has been a deep desire of mine. Remember how I said, in my happier dreams, I sometimes have telekenesis? Those dreams are truly exhilarating; I feel a sense of deep release and joy and freedom. In normal life, I have felt that feeling just a few times. I am claustrophobic and very agoraphilic, and one notable time when I felt it strongly was my only airplane flights so far in my life, a year ago, to and from Chicago to visit relatives. I don't know if you know how it feels to look at a wide open space and feel the open space completely and the distance between yourself and the ground - if you are agoraphobic, forget I said anything - but that is the same feeling that I get in my telekinetic dreams. I desired telekinetic abilities in the dream with the same degree of fervor that I feared objects flying about outside my control, perhaps more, and I was willing to lose the vibrancy of my soul for that telekinetic feeling. That was the part of the dream that scared me in retrospect the most, that I would do such a thing. At least I caught hold of myself!
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