Re: Dealing with pain and depression

Posted by Nyks on October 24, 2000 at 12:48:16:

In Reply to: Dealing with pain and depression posted by Sambersil on October 23, 2000 at 22:12:19:

: Keep trying. If it hurts, keep at it. If it makes you sad, keep at it. If nothing else, you get pain and sadness, which can make you very happy when you look back at it. "Wow, I had the willpower to live through that?" you can think, and feel a glow of pride and energy. This is an attitude I often adopt to painful activities; pain, given time, yields happiness and more willpower, so experience pain (especially emotional, the memory of physical pain fades too fast for much benefit) to gain the rewards of both the activity that gave you pain and the sense of self worth and accomplishment of experiencing it.

It hurts like hell, especially if you try to keep it inside and bottle it up, or want to tell the loved one certain things (how angry you are, how disappointed you are, how you feel in general) but can't or keep that inside, too. Everything will remind you of it when you're going through it, so much that you can't listen to the radio because of all the love-songs they play there. Toni Braxton was killing me when I was going through it around '96-97.
I achieved my closure on it when I dreamt of saying goodbye to him, after about a year or so. He was with another in the dream, too, and I expressed how sad I was that he didn't care about me even as a friend, but chose to ignore me and treat me in a hostile manner when I was getting over it and was ready to "just be friends" as he'd originally wished. He didn't really care in the dream either, but I had a chance to express what I felt and was more or less over it after that. Until then I used my friends as "shoulders to cry on", until they probably got fed up with the subject. Talk about it, write about it, scream about it, it won't help until somehow you heal inside, but it's better than not processing it at all.

Follow Ups:

Post a Followup