Posted by deras (65.64.136.131) on January 20, 2003 at 01:30:47:
In Reply to: Re: 5s and the mating ritual posted by Amy (66.125.89.234) on January 19, 2003 at 21:25:46:
GRIP is mentioned in most social psychology textbooks... it is more directly applied to conflict resolution but i think it works well for relationship development. if sex is the whole point and you are attractive and the guy is not a monk, he will sleep with you even if he does not exactly love you. invite him over, feed him drinks, lead him into your bedroom, and subtlely paw him... you should get your desired result (but this might endanger a long term relationship if he has some ingrained notions of wanting to wed the virgin mary). especially, since this guy is a six, you sort of have to make things as clear as you can because they are so indecisive... sixes look to others for cues. i wonder if you might be a six too (take the test i posted a link to and post your results). if you are both sixes, one of you will have to set a faster pace if there is ever going to be any progress.
i think the master GRIP utilizer has a tamed sex drive... and does not let that effect their judgement too much. if you let your instinctual drives motivate you, then you risk making bad decisions and hooking up with incompatible people. as far as attraction, i think you have sexual attraction (quite common), heart attraction (less common), and mental attraction (least common). if you have all three with someone, then i think a relationship happens very naturally... if you have only a two of those (or one or even two and a half) then you experience the awkwardness and frustration that defines most romantic interactions. i think a smart person might pass on any situation where the attraction triad does not exist but most people are not smart, they are desperate, insecure, and afraid to be alone. i think if you can't be good friends with the person first then it does not meet the triad test. also, to go out with someone you don't mentally connect with (i.e. love their mind) is basically a betrayal of your own mind.