Enneagram Main Board Archive

Re: Some more answers

Re: Some more answers

[ Follow Ups ] [ Post Followup ] [ Enneagram Message Board ] [ FAQ ]

Posted by Kronus on September 30, 1998 at 20:31:47:

In Reply to: Some answers, some more questions posted by Hal on September 30, 1998 at 13:50:52:

: That was helpful, Kronus, especially the idea that a 7 will just go out and DO, while a 4 spends a great deal of time feeling things out first.

: I'm still not entirely clear on the fear of a 7. Exactly what are 7's afraid of?

SEVENS don't exactly FEAR PAIN it is just that we prefer not to experience it! Fundamentally, that is the one emotion that we are less equiped to deal with. And, it is probably less about physical pain than emotional pain. The SEVEN in high school is involved and popular but afraid to date because of the emotional fear of rejection. One way to avoid rejection is to "not-ask"! So... lack of committment start there; if we commit then the other party backs away we are faced with the fear of rejection, ergo don't commit, no rejection, no emotional pain. This is believed to have manifest itself as a care-giver who was detatched or distant for either physical or emotional reasons. Much like the FOUR who feals abandoned. I suspect there is a lot of foundational relating between the FOUR and the SEVEN. The major difference is in how a SEVEN differs from a FOUR in response.

Fear of pain, or fear of the potential for pain? I don't quite see how 7 fear differs from 4 fear. We both tend to have trouble living in the present, and are always dreaming of a better future. 4's probably spend more time in the past than 7's, however, also thinking about things we've lost. As a 4, I always worry that wherever I am, I'm missing out on somthing better that's happening elsewhere. There is also a feeling that what I have is not enough; a constant search to find the thing that will satisfy me, and a fear that I never will. This seems very similar to a 7's need for new experiences.

: Is 7 gluttony all that different from 4 envy?

Yes, the emotion of envy is like a "mud wallow" which allows the FOUR to immerse themselves in the pain and immobilize their spirit. The SEVEN's gluttony uses experience as emotional "white-noise" to drown out the pain of someone else's pleasure. Where the FOUR may use emotional internalization the SEVEN uses externalized experience. Quite a different response.
The envious 4 will see things in others that we are missing, and long for those things to make our life more complete. Where is a 7 looking that leads to gluttony?

: BTW, I do agree that 7 and 4 make a great combination. I'm still looking for my 7, to make my life complete. :-)

: - Hal -
AT end: Kronus

Follow Ups:

Re: Sublimate introject Brian C. 23:02:25 9/30/98 (11)
- Re: Thoughtful and concise... Kronus 08:34:18 10/01/98 (10)
  - Re: Thoughtful and concise... Hal 10:00:18 10/01/98 (9)
    - Re: Thoughtful and concise... Brian C. 01:02:49 10/02/98 (8)
      - Re: Thoughtful and concise... Christy 16:28:21 10/02/98 (7)
        
        Re: There is the dark-side to SEVEN Kronus 22:48:45 10/03/98 (6)
        
        Re: There is the dark-side to SEVEN Hal 10:20:46 10/05/98 (0)
        
        Re: There is the dark-side to SEVEN Christy 09:54:39 10/05/98 (4)
        
        No, there was no easy time; yes I am a brat!!! Kronus 00:12:56 10/06/98 (3)
        
        Re: No, there was no easy time; yes I am a brat!!! Geenius at Wrok 10:28:34 10/06/98 (2)
        
        Re: No, there was no easy time; yes I am a brat!!! Christy 11:50:27 10/06/98 (1)
        
        Re: So perhaps the crucible is different? Kronus 19:24:31 10/06/98 (0)

Post a Followup

Name:
E-Mail:

Subject:

Comments:
: : That was helpful, Kronus, especially the idea that a 7 will just go out and DO, while a 4 spends a great deal of time feeling things out first. : : I'm still not entirely clear on the fear of a 7. Exactly what are 7's afraid of? : : SEVENS don't exactly FEAR PAIN it is just that we prefer not to experience it! Fundamentally, that is the one emotion that we are less equiped to deal with. And, it is probably less about physical pain than emotional pain. The SEVEN in high school is involved and popular but afraid to date because of the emotional fear of rejection. One way to avoid rejection is to "not-ask"! So... lack of committment start there; if we commit then the other party backs away we are faced with the fear of rejection, ergo don't commit, no rejection, no emotional pain. This is believed to have manifest itself as a care-giver who was detatched or distant for either physical or emotional reasons. Much like the FOUR who feals abandoned. I suspect there is a lot of foundational relating between the FOUR and the SEVEN. The major difference is in how a SEVEN differs from a FOUR in response. : Fear of pain, or fear of the potential for pain? I don't quite see how 7 fear differs from 4 fear. We both tend to have trouble living in the present, and are always dreaming of a better future. 4's probably spend more time in the past than 7's, however, also thinking about things we've lost. As a 4, I always worry that wherever I am, I'm missing out on somthing better that's happening elsewhere. There is also a feeling that what I have is not enough; a constant search to find the thing that will satisfy me, and a fear that I never will. This seems very similar to a 7's need for new experiences. : : Is 7 gluttony all that different from 4 envy? : Yes, the emotion of envy is like a "mud wallow" which allows the FOUR to immerse themselves in the pain and immobilize their spirit. The SEVEN's gluttony uses experience as emotional "white-noise" to drown out the pain of someone else's pleasure. Where the FOUR may use emotional internalization the SEVEN uses externalized experience. Quite a different response. : The envious 4 will see things in others that we are missing, and long for those things to make our life more complete. Where is a 7 looking that leads to gluttony? : : BTW, I do agree that 7 and 4 make a great combination. I'm still looking for my 7, to make my life complete. :-) : : - Hal - : AT end: Kronus

Optional Link URL:
Link Title:
Optional Image URL:

[ Follow Ups ] [ Post Followup ] [ Enneagram Message Board ] [ FAQ ] wwwboard/messages/236.html

Your Ad Here