Posted by Hal on October 05, 1998 at 10:20:46:
In Reply to: Re: There is the dark-side to SEVEN posted by Kronus on October 03, 1998 at 22:48:45:
: There are some aspects to the SEVEN that are not quite, as we say, "delightfully amusing". For example when SEVENs get bored they are likely to move on to another experience or topic. Such is the case with so much in life.
: As my spouse daid today: She learned from a FOUR panel last weekend in San Francisco: "Forget about it... most people aren't paying attention to you anyway... people think less about you than you think." I responded: "I have always lived like that!" to which she responded: "typical SEVEN, you don't pay attention to other people so you don't think anyone is paying attention to you or anyone else for that matter!"
: If people do pay attention to us we are into them for as long as they are interesting... NOT for as long as they are interested!
: Kronus
An excellent point, Kronus, and one I hadn't considered. That could be what makes a 4/7 relationship an exciting, but volatile one. I have always been worried that people would not find me interesting, and therefore not like me, not include me in their plans, etc. And then I kick myself when I find myself using the performing aspects of point 3 to impress people. It seems like a no-win situation, but the answer is obviously self-acceptance, probably for 7's as well as 4's.
And Christy, about point 0, here's my take on the contraversial subject. I believe that the only people who become point 0's are those Enlightened people who have realized their oneness with God, people like Jesus, the Buddha; and some people around today that you may not have heard of, like Richard Rose, Jim Burns, Bernadette Roberts, and several others. They say that they have lost their sense of self, meaning they no longer see themselves as separate, individual beings, kind of a loss of the ego. Along with this is a loss of all the fears that bring about the nine different types, or more correctly, a realization that these fears are not real.
In any case, there is no formula for creating a type 0 person. It requires an individual search for truth. Not to say that you can't have help along the way--others are a huge help in any spiritual search. But ultimately it's not something that can be taught from a book, or even by example--it must be experienced. I hope that my search leads me there someday. An important thing for a parent to keep in mind, I think, is that there is no way to keep a child from experiencing pain or disappointment or loss or anything else we consider undesirable. Pain is as much a necessary part of growing up (and a necessary part of a spiritual search) as joy is, and you can't pick and choose to give your child only joy. Be there to help him/her through the rough times, but it's a mistake to try to shelter a child from everything bad in an attempt to make their lives better, IMO. For a 4, you can see that as a form of 2-ish manipulation, trying to get your child to avoid things you found painful, and operating out of fear that your child will grow up unhappy.
- Hal -