Posted by P on October 29, 2001 at 18:12:51:
In Reply to: The life of me posted by Cory on October 28, 2001 at 02:03:13:
> I know you want to know about me. This is some sort of cheap prostitution. I am somewhat of a celebrity in your pathetic world. You devote yourself to this board because you have a useless life...like me. I am a celebrity to you; you are a celebrity to me. We both realize our lives our useless and purposeless and worthless.
> This is why I apologize to everyone on here.
> I am being sincere. Since Fall of '99 I have been here. This is probably the first time I've been sincere to the people on this board. I've always been a charlatan, or a prankster, or a jerk...but this time I am being honest to you.
> If a person had a GOOD LIFE, would they spend it on here? I know I've been spending less hours on this board...but that's because I'm a sexaholic, pot addicted maniac, and an alcoholic...reminds me...I need my fix right now. I am an ADDICT to HEDONISM. Liz says I am really a closeted moralist, trying to prove a point. I don't know if she is right or not; all I know is I trust her deeply and I think she knows the True Me. I act as a leach onto her. It's strange that she thinks I'm a Five when I act so Fourish to her. She knows the real me.
> I know I dissent from the enneagram from time to time. But that is my Six Wing talking. I truly am a Five. I believe it in my heart. Yes, the ultra-logical FIVE believes it in his HEART. I realize my questions about the enneagram are simply a misunderstanding.
> Ok, look, if you're thinking "This is a bunch of bullshit" I admit I've had a bowl of pot, 5 bottles of Miller, and 2 shots of Jim Beam. ;) This shit may fuck me up in the long run, but at least it makes me honest in the present.
> I am a Five. The Four and Six wing have battled to control me for a long time. The Four Wing represents my free, artistic, liberal nature while the Six Wing longs for security, rules, and simplicity.
> Tonight I romance the counterwing Six and loot my city. Just the other night I threw three shrimp lo mein leftover dinners onto a Lexus SUV?
> Why?
> Cuz I hate rich fuckers.
> And their pretentious wannabe trucks.
> Diarmuid, maybe you know me as a Conservative, but I've changed into a liberal a long time ago. I understand the pain of the underclass and the worker first hand because I've lived as one for the past 3 years.
> Life changed for me at 18. I was ushered out of my sheltered childhood into an adulthood of struggle, misery, but occasional fun. I haven't moved forward socially. I still work at the same job...the first and only job I've had...since October 30, 1998.
> Maybe it's complacency. Maybe it's fear of the unknown. All I know is I am tied down and I know who I am.
> My girlfriend has been pregnant for 3 months. We are planning on getting an abortion this week or the next. I remember Spring of 2000 ranting about being against abortion. But since then I've become to be Pro-Choice. And know that I have experienced this situation directly, I realize abortion is a better choice than to give a hard life to another human being.
> Abortion is the more empathic choice; whether or not those Pro-Life freaks want to admit it.
> I have a $60 a week habit for pot...I drink everyday..
> Down in the spiral I go.
> Hey, the enneagram is right...5 to 7...
> although I think the enneagram must be a bit more liberal. Riso says the descent to 7 is more so symbolic, in that the 5's mind heats up and goes crazy...No...I know differently. I literally become a semi-7 in that I cannot digest life, I become a consumer, and I addict myself to death.
> That is all, for now...
> -Cory
> 5w4 INTP