Posted by Dave on October 24, 1998 at 10:34:24:
In Reply to: Re: 8-4 relationship Help, Help, HELP! posted by mykl on October 24, 1998 at 04:55:04:
: :
: Wow, You went right for the throat!
: Eights are in charge, never forget that.
: They will push you until you push back, then they will respect
: the limits you impose. Yet they truly want to help the victim find
: justice in an otherwise unfair world.
: You may want to appeal to his sense of fairness, but remember that
: Eights have little tollerence for the weak in this world so develop
: a strong case. Deep inside they are pussy-cats, you just need to get
: by their public image.
: --------------------------------------
I have alot of 8 friends and associates and until I learned about the enneagram, what I thought was rude, abrasive, insulting, tactless, brutal blunt honesty was in fact just a style of 8 communication (that is entranced 8). Instinctively I eventually learned to communicate in an "in your face" style, and I was amazed that they felt closer yo me, when in fact I thought they'd get pissed off at me and end our friendship. The opposite happened.I've become a very trusted friend to them, and I can enjoy the "spirited debates" we have (though sometimes I'm not in the mood).
Your comments are all well taken and I hope they take it and use it.
-Dave