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Enneagram Main Board Archive Re: A new Developmental theoryPosted by Derf on October 25, 1998 at 09:55:50: In Reply to: A new Developmental theory posted by Dave on October 25, 1998 at 06:48:28: Dear Dave - you had to expect this, so I'll get it out of the way.... My siblings and I are 5/4 (youngest), 7w6 (middle), and 4 (oldest - me) - there was nothing non-traditional about our upbringing. My parents were 1w2 and 9w8 - conformists to the hilt. If they were a little awkward (which is not necessarily an accusation of "evil" or anything), it wasn't for lack of trying to be the blandest middle-class suburban outfit. Another family I know (parents: 4w3 and 1w9; children: 6w5, 6w7, 3w2) demonstrate the reverse of my situation - unconventional parents and ultra-conformist kids. I admit that your neat little theory is the first of its kind that I've taken the time to try to comprehend. This is partly because I don't care too much for the "quantum" mathematical/structural side of spirituality, or for bone-dry philosophy in general, but also because I've been feeling the limitations of this kind of exchange medium. I've been thinking about an accusation made to me recently on this board about the futility of promoting theory and the advantage of the first-hand honesty and infallibility of the "oral tradition." Ironically, this board, of late, has been experiencing more abstract theory promotions than ever before. The Internet and the books were a wonderful primer, but after a year of exchanging ideas (and sometimes even *experiences* once in a while) on boards like this, and two years of knowing about the "gram" in general, I think I'm through taking the third-hand "conceptual theorizations" so seriously, and my next step, if there is any, will be to experience the "oral tradition" in the form of teachers and pupils who are willing to share first-hand experiences about the fascination and ordeal of living with their personalities. If I attend workshops and training, maybe I'll even speak up in them! I consider myself bashful, awkward, and too self-conscious to even risk humiliation, but maybe I'm actually cut out for spiritual gatherings, because oddly, I speak up more easily when the information has at least a personable edge to it. It flows more naturally. I can be "sure" of the outside world only when it's not facing me - i.e., only when I'm secluded, or at most, with a few individuals who have learned to put up with my "philosophy." I could never promote "head-in-the-clouds" theory in front of a bunch of eyes, so maybe those eyes will be useful in keeping me on track. Affronted by a crowd, all I can be sure about is what's going on inside of me. And that's exactly what they will want to hear. Maybe E4/INFP (that's me, of course!) should work on E1/ESTJ skills. (Not that I ever hope to genuinely get along with that particular type!) This Enneagram/MB business has been all about growth, self-esteem, and understanding, and there are other paths to take.
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