Posted by Emily (68.13.146.250) on April 30, 2002 at 00:45:06:
Riso says that our Unconscious Childhood Message is what we percieved from our parents growing up.
Unconscious Childhood Messages
Type One: It's not ok to make mistakes.
Type Two: It's not ok to have your own needs.
Type Three: It's not ok to have your own feelings and identity.
Type Four: It's not ok to be too functional or too happy.
Type Five: It's not ok to be comfortable in the world.
Type Six: It's not ok to trust yourself.
Type Seven: It's not ok to depend on anyone for anything.
Type Eight: It's not ok to be vulnerable or to trust anyone.
Type Nine: It's not ok to assert yourself.
And then there are the Lost Childhood Messages for each type, that we do not hear as children, that Riso thinks becomes the central issue in our lives. We want to hear these things more than anything else. When someone we know says our particular message, either directly or indirectly, we feel very close to them but don't know why.
Lost Childhood Messages
Type One: You are good.
Type Two: You are wanted.
Type Three: You are loved for yourself.
Type Four: You are seen for who you are.
Type Five: Your needs are not a problem.
Type Six: You are safe.
Type Seven: You will be taken care of.
Type Eight: You will not be betrayed.
Type Nine: Your presence matters.
-Emily