Posted by Margaret (206.203.36.168) on April 30, 2002 at 19:45:14:
In Reply to: You've done well! Congrats!! NT posted by Sharlee (203.45.206.21) on April 30, 2002 at 05:05:11:
Thank you Sharlee, but I didn't do too good in the interview today. Mostly because I didn't show enough enthusiasm - and no doubt this is because deep down inside I am really eager to go down south and meet a potential life partner. My reluctancy to stay here not longer than 1 or 2 weeks showed. So now I'm thinking I should just go down south at the end of the month, regardless of assignment, try this out, and give it a shot, otherwise I won't be albe to get a long term job because of my reluctancy and wanting to go somewhere else I simply cannot hide.
I am having trouble deciding whether to go now or in a year.
You have experience with both family and career, what do you think?
If I do go, and it doesn't work within a year, then I will have lost a year's worth of decent income, enough to finance a 6 mo trip back to europe for more sightseeing, plus less one year to get a family started, plus one less year of finding someone new.
If I don't go, and I stay here, I probably will not do too good in my job because I will always be thinking about the other choice, nor will I be able to find any other potential life partner, becuase I will still be too pre-occupied thinking about someone else.
If I do go, and it does work out, my biggest fear then, is what if I don't get to go on my trip back to Europe?
Just looking at the employment market, I could make enough to save for a 6mo trip to Europe here, but I don't know if I could there.
Then again, I am so eager to go down there and see if this might work, I can't get a job because they *see* how eager I am to 'not stay here long'.
My biggest losses are my trip to Europe, if it does work, and if it doesn't work, another year behind family making (finding a new parter, etc), and I'm pushing it as it is. GOSH, Sharlee, all your experience and knowledge. Please, what do you think? How can one possibly organize and and put in best order, my goals with not very well known outcomes? ?
> > It's so easy to generalize things. When one thing goes wrong, it could easily seem to have the domino effect, and soon enough the rest of your world seems to have gone wrong, too.
> > A good way to overcome this is to "step out" of your current world, and open yourself up to new experiences. Take risks. That's what I did today, and I don't feel so much a "wreck" now. My life has changed for the better today just because of this.
> > I signed up with another agency. They had a new assignment pop up earlier today that could last 6 months but it requires a 12 hour work day, plus overtime on top of that. I was not crazy about the hours, however, it would pay more than my last one. It offered something I've never made before, so there was no way I could turn it down. If this thing works, all I have to do is work my buns off for the next 6 mo, save as much as possible, then be much better off than I am now.
> > All this just because I got my buns out of bed today, and forced myself to be brave and keep pounding the pavement and knocking on doors, instead of laying in bed feeling depressed and hopeless and scared of the future.
> > The key for better health and integration is to pace yourself, keep working on looking for what you need to make your life less stressful, whther it's a job with income, finding the right health club, a decent place to live, etc. and sooner or later something will come up if you just have patience.
> > I am no longer a wreck. Although my future plans have been delayed, at least I am no longer a wreck because I don't fear not having a place to live anymore. I don't like that fear. That's my second greatest fear. And it seems that just might have been taken care of. (Hopefully).