Posted by Gigi on June 30, 1999 at 16:40:09:
In Reply to: Re: To be a 2 (or not 2 b) posted by Ronnie on June 30, 1999 at 03:28:02:
> > Ronnie, all you need to do is to read Riso's book, Personality Types. 2 with 1W keeps things simple and functional. There is a conflict between their principles and their heart. Abstract ideas conflict with feelings, so it is hard for them ro empathise with others. They are controlling of themselves
> > and others. They prefer to be in the background. 2 with 3W on the other hand, easily relates to people. They are more friendly and outgoing. They enjoy attention. Social qualities are valued more. So there you are. You are torn between ideals(1) and feelings(2). Is this of any help? Love, Gigi
> Yes, that conflict between my feelings and ideals of "correct" and "right" have often pulled me apart, I just haven't realized what has been going on.
> It's amazing how easily you misperceive yourself.
You are right, it is very easy to misperceive oneself. When I talk to people about the Enneagram, they often say "I know myself already; why go through all this trouble of reading the stuff?" I tell them again that they might find new things as I did myself when I first came across the Enneagram. My Enne teacher told me that I was either an 8 or a 3 with 4W. I read both descriptions. The 8 one did not appeal to me very much. When I read the 3 with 4W I could not stop the whole night (Riso's book) I read and reread. There was some sort of a dagger in my heart. It hurt so much. I cried. I did not want to be a 3. I wanted to be an 8. But as time went on I accepted myself; now I laugh at all the struggle I gave not
to be a 3. Now I know much more about all the types. I am a 3 and I love it. I observe myself very closely and I catch myself being a 3, travelling between all health levels. Or I think I do. Somebody comes along and says for example "Why do you think everything should be your way?" and I am surprised that I still keep that trait. We need people to give us feedback about ourselves. Love, Gigi