Posted by Eddie on July 31, 1999 at 21:24:13:
In Reply to: are 2's really?? empathic?? posted by bev on July 31, 1999 at 19:25:03:
> hello anybody and everyone or whoever
> i have been giving some serious thought to some discord i feel about the enneagram...i am wondering if it is just me or have others had similar thoughts... i have been studying and reading the enneagram for the past eight or nine years.. i am a 4w5 or 5w4 ... i can never make an absolute delination...however, i have come to realize that as long as i am aware of self in differing situations...a clear distinction is not that necessary...i want to both to know myself and to understand my world
> anyway, my discord stems from experiences i have had with other types, in particular, 2's... experiences that were harmful to me and to which they, never gave any additional attention nor were upset by... two's are often described as empathic...whether healthy or not..empathy, to me is best described as being able to feel as another feels... to begin with i do not think this is possible as we can only feel what we imagine what others feel based on our own life experience of similar feelings,...i can never truly feel the depth of someone elses emotions.. i can only imagine.. i prefer to espouse a similar view as Carl rogers ..... empathic understanding...anyway.. in my experiences with these twos... one male and one female, neither actually were empathic but were attempting to impose/project their emotions on me... i should feel as they did about the situation... it was very artificial and felt dismissive to me.. which neither of them appeared to notice... am i confused in my understanding of the two type or is it my 4 haughtyness "how dare they not see my feelings as unique or different from theirs?"
> some comments would be appreciated...it's one of those life mysteries i would like to understand... as i work with both these people...on a daily basis...
> bev
Bev:
Ever notice how dogs seem to have an uncanny ability to know what you're thinking. Dumb as they are, they focus on their master all the time and consequently pick up clues. 2s are much the same. They "feel" your feelings because they notice; they are in tune; they are sensitive to nuance. Most other e-types are like the master, they just give their dogs 1 percent of their attention and miss most of the obvious clues.
Now that you have the obsequious dog image in your mind, you can use it whenever you come across a two that ticks you off. Yea, they sometimes seem like man's best friend the way they hover when they are looking for attention. And they seem just as hurt when you reject them. At least with a dog, you know it is just a dog and the feelings, if present at all, are forgotten in two minutes. With a 2, you can expect them to remind you of a slight transgression until the day you die--they never forget.
Ed. definitely not a 2