Posted by Tigger on September 19, 1999 at 20:28:21:
In Reply to: HELP!!!! NEED ADVICE! WHAT TO DO NOW?!! posted by Cecil on September 19, 1999 at 17:27:41:
I'm so glad we heard from you Cecil, because I was worried about you and worried about the fishing boat idea. The emotional situation you're in happens to lots of people, most women I know anyway. The physical one would need us to know more about, before making any suggestions. You need in the long term to feel more settled, find some stability and a community.
For the moment:-
a) Don't let your current state of mind drag on. Take the initiative and contact him, say your in town and are you going to meet up or not. You badly need information about his feelings and intentions in order to sort this out.
b) write down the possiblities open to you. Where to live, what to do etc. and put down their pros and cons. See how you feel about each.
c) If it's a nice town, where you can get to know people, then you might meet a better man there. I thought you were considering going to college. That would give you some stability for a while, and it could be a good place to meet men. Decide what you would do if this bloke didn't exist and do it. Don't let more than a few days pass before finding out if he's interested or not.Look at what he's offering and decide if it's what you had in mind. Don't compromise your standards of what you expect from someone. You need to find someone who will respect you or it will be pointless.
Whenever I've done something a bit wild because the situation was making me feel like it, it has made things much worse. It's not good for your self-respect either. Just tell him you like to know what's happening because there are lots of friends you've arranged to visit.Don't give the impression of begging, just be straight and assertive and hold on to your values. Imagine yourself as a friend of yours and what you'd tell her to do and say to support her.
Well those are MY thougts anyway. Look after yourself - please!
Keep posting, Tigs.